You know how things that first appear complicated turn out easy, almost self-evident once you get the hang of them? Like kids learning the necessities. Walking, talking, jumping, climbing. Most of us learn to master those skills at some point, and have no trouble with them for the best part of our lives.
And you know how you might be struggling with a difficult question for some time, but once cracking it, it looks so simple? ‘Why didn’t I think of that before?’ Suddenly it’s crystal clear, often without any apparent reason.
I think there are a number of things that don’t mean anything to us or are too complicated or incomprehensible – until the right time comes. Many educational experts say that you can’t make a child read until she is ready. One can teach all they like, but the child doesn’t get the sensation and the joy of letters becoming words, words becoming meaningful sentences, and rushing on with a life their own, talking to her about far away places and dreams coming true. And once we’re grown up, we may read or hear something when without resonance to us, it’s only words followed by others, without depth, furthermore, without meaning.
As I’ve been spending time slowing down, downsizing, and simplifying, many things I looked at as normal have lost their meaning to me. It seems that I’m taking such a distance from the ‘normal world’ that it’s all going up side down for me.
- Earning approx less than 1/3 of what we used to make
- Re-evaluating the idea of traditional school system and considering to unschool
- Not having a proper job
- Spending most of the time outdoors, with family and animals, not worrying about what time it is or what needs to be done next
- Not having big career goals
Have stopped making any sense
- The concepts of ‘failure‘, ‘permanent‘, and ‘competition‘ – among others
- Watching the news on a daily, even weekly basis
- Doing something that doesn’t resonate with me
- Defining myself with checks and crosses on my to do list
- Deciding definitely anything that happens farther away than in the next few days or weeks
We haven’t turned completely hippie here, don’t worry. It’s just that I’m becoming more in tuned with what is good and healthy for me. And thus, my family. That makes sense. I thought of this project as a year long thing, expecting that to be long enough. Within a year we would learn to live in a more sustainable way, we would find out more about ourselves and the world. Well, naturally, we have. But I see it’s a sloooow process. One that is only now starting to unravel. There are more good practical ideas, more solutions found. Also dreams are becoming more vivid and powerful. Senses are getting more subtle. New kinds of foods are appealing to me. The body is looking for ways to unblock.
For the last two months or so I’ve been suffering from migraine (I’ve had it since adolescence) more often than usual. I dislike the condition, but it’s a sign I’m grateful for. The body asks the questions and gives the answers. It reminds me of love, peace, slow, easy. It can be blocked or it can flow. It makes sense.
And day by day, month by month, it’s getting clearer. Without any apparent reason.
(In my next post I’ll write more of what’s up on the mountain regarding the goals I set late last year.)